Sunday, 9 May 2010

Venus and the Theory of Height

Venus is a planet in our solar system. Look, there it is:


I am a bit of an expert on the subject of planet Venus. I can tell you all about orbits and diameters and other science physics. I recently got to prove this when I was invited to debate the subject of climate change on a local radio station.

My tactic was to throw out as many arguments as quickly as possible. At one point I clocked 27apm (arguments per minute). This devastated my opponent who only had time to cross-examine one of my arguments about Venus, so naturally I won the debate. Unfortunately the powers that be got wind of my victory and made sure the interview was never broadcast, but here is the relevant part of the transcript for educational purposes. The other guy's questions are in bold.

You've made a whole load of arguments there but I will pick up on one subject I am familiar with - what did you mean when you said "Venus is a con"?

It's a big fat con, the planet Venus reflects so much sunlight that it should be freezing. Instead it's really about 800 degrees F. For centuries so-called "climate scientists" have been coming up with all sorts of wacky explanations for Venus being so hot. Typically climate scientists take drugs to come up with their ideas. One of these "ideas" is called the greenhouse effect. They claim Venus is so hot because of greenhouse gases.

(pointless arguments about whether climate scientists do or do not take drugs removed)

I discovered climate scientists didn't have a clue. It's all just group think. I found the actual reason for Venus being so hot and it isn't anything to do with greenhouse gases.

So you are saying the greenhouse effect doesn't have any effect on Venus?

I never claimed that! The greenhouse effect perhaps causes as much as a few degrees F of the 800F on Venus. I believe that's sufficiently low to prevent tax rises and that's all that matters.

So how do you explain the bulk of the warming on Venus?

Venus has a thick atmosphere and therefore, like my blog schedule, it has a lot of pressure. Pressure leads to stress, stress leads to things getting hot under the collar. On Venus things are about 800F under the collar. In technical physics speak, air gets very hot when it is squashed together. If ever you travel to the arctic be sure to carry a canister of squashed air to provide yourself with a permanent heat source.

So you are saying a planet can be warmed indefinitely with a high pressure atmosphere?

I didn't make that specific claim, stop putting words in my mouth!

The thing you are missing and scientists are missing is that there is a thing called a lapse rate. As you travel upwards it gets colder. So clearly temperature is determined by height, not "greenhouse gases" or "sunlight". That's why hospitals should put patients with hypothermia in the basement.

But you said it was pressure now you are saying it is height!

Yes I did, I am saying both and at the same time saying neither. If you pick one I will say the other. The only thing I am saying for sure is that it's not the greenhouse effect. That's the main point, the rest of the stuff is just loose justification. Stop going on about it. You are missing the main point which is that it's definitely not the greenhouse effect! Not the IPCC!

But where are you proposing the additional heat comes from? Even if all incoming sunlight is absorbed how do you get a temperature warmer than a blackbody without greenhouse gases reducing outgoing radiation?

Pressure and height! It's obvious! My Theory of Height predicts that the center of the Earth will be very hot. It is! Your greenhouse gas theory doesn't predict the center of the Earth will be hot. Therefore I am right and you are wrong! This is good old fashioned observational science from yesteryear! Admit your science is a lie! Admit it!

None of that makes sense, it's

Admit it!

simplistic and if it

Admit it!

was remotely true scientists would have already noted it.

No! they suffer from Group Think! Lying fraud group think! Also they arrogantly don't realize they are all wrong and I am right! Just admit it! Can't you just admit it and confess?!

(the host ended the debate at this point, apparently because I was "shouting and thumping the desk", but I suspect the station receives some form of state funding and he was just worried the truth I spoke might jeopardize it)

101 comments:

  1. I have my own theory about why Venus is so hot!

    Mundus vult decipi, ergo decipiatur.

    ReplyDelete
  2. The other half of Venus is gone! It's been planet-napped, or semi-planet-napped anyway! Where have you taken it, cruel Inferno?

    ReplyDelete
  3. Boom-Boom Boris10 May 2010 at 22:43

    We already know who the anonymous cowards Tamino and Rabett are, and now we also know the name of our infernal hero: Steven Goddard.

    Sir, I salute you.

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  4. Scientists tell us that Venus is closer to the sun than the earth, but after many years of looking at the sun I have never once seen Venus. Therefore, blogic makes it clear that Venus does not exist! Look at the "picture" of "Venus" Inferno has posted, it looks like an out of focus tennis ball, not a planet. Ask yourself, which is more likely?
    Clearly Venus was invented by a drugged up Carl Sagan so climate “scientists” could claim their fraudulent greenhouse effect could make a planet hot. What better way to do this than to invent a far away planet?
    Luckily blog scientists have been able to devise even better reasons for why “Venus” is so hot. Take that scientists, once again your fraudulent schemes have been bested by blog sciences’ finest minds.

    ReplyDelete
  5. this is a joke, isn't it?

    ReplyDelete
  6. I bet the people on Venus don't even mind the heat. There's a new alarmist paper out (visit: http://skepticalscience.com/Heat-stress-setting-an-upper-limit-on-what-we-can-adapt-to.html), and it shows earthlings enjoy wet bulb temperatures up to 35C. But wet bulb temperatures on Earth only get up to about 30C. This is proof that Earth temperatures were higher in the MWP, otherwise how would evolution explain how much we like temperatures warmer than exist? Ever hear of Bikram yoga? I suspect people on Venus really like yoga!

    ReplyDelete
  7. S, that would be a sensible explanation if evilution weren't one of those frauds made up by "sceintists". I think it's just another example of how the Lord is protecting its people from too warm temperatures (unless they end up in hell, of course ;) That's another reason why climate change cannot exist: the Lord would prevent it as long as we follow His ways.

    ReplyDelete
  8. They ended the debate because you're obviously unstable. I've only read about 3 of your posts and I must say, the dribble and uneducated blather on here is ridiculous. I'm tempted to agree with the question, "Is this a joke?"

    I really can't tell.

    The only reason you THINK you won that debate, is because you didn't give your opponent a change to retort. That is also why they ended it. A debate is a structured sharing and discounting/proving of ideas based on factual information or sometimes, opinion.

    You have this mentality that people are out to get you and your ideas. You seem paranoid and quick to discount the research of others based on your speculations (that are pulled from thin air). You know what that is called in the medical field?

    Schizophrenia.

    I'm a proponent for free speech so I won't go as far as telling you you have no place spewing this level of ignorance. But I urge anyone taking this seriously to weigh the mentality and arguments of this person against multiple sources.

    ReplyDelete
  9. Venus is so hot her blue jeans caught fire! (And it wasn't 'cause of any methane).

    This thread deserves to be nominated for some kind of poe award.

    -Son of WTFUWT

    ReplyDelete
  10. OK, this is the first post I have read, and WTF, this blog has to be a parody. There's no way that any intellectually honest person would proudly admit to using the Gish Gallop! Just looked through your other posts on this blog and yep, the entire blog is either a parody or some scientifically illiterate nutjob really does actually believe what they're writing. Really hoping it's the former.

    ReplyDelete
  11. Sorry but this has nothing to with AGW. I'm going on a tour of Alaska shortly.

    Does anyone know where I can get one of those canisters of squashed air to keep me warm?

    Thanks in advance, and keep up the good work debunking those nasty drug-addict climate scientists!

    ReplyDelete
  12. Venus is hot because she is the goddess of love. You would be hot too if the clouds did not obscure her incredible hotness. Proof that God exists due to this show of decency by an old fashioned planet. Not like the disgustingly nude moon, puke.

    P.S. It is a great injustice where the powerful lying scientists can shut down your free speech and make you disappear (I'll be careful their, they might go to extremes) from the radio waves. All the cards are stacked in their favor while they lie and cheat without a care in the world. It's difficult getting the truth across in such a toxic climate.

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  20. Sorry but this has nothing to with AGW. I'm going on a tour of Alaska shortly.

    Does anyone know where I can get one of those canisters of squashed air to keep me warm?

    Thanks in advance, and keep up the good work debunking those nasty drug-addict climate scientists!

    ReplyDelete
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